F**k, Now There Are Two of You by Adam Mansbach

It turns out that two is a million more kids than one.

Adam Mansbach famously gave voice to two of parenting's primal struggles in Go the Fuck to Sleep and You Have to Fucking Eat. Now Fuck, Now There Are Two of You tackles a new addition to the family and all the fears and frustrations attendant to the simple, math-defying fact that two is a million more kids than one.

As you probably know by now, you shouldn't read it to a child.